“Fear is the place where i have hidden my heart”
I was never given much of a chance
told I was shy
a word reflects
the boy responds.
Like if you told your bad repeatedly with no explanation
a label forms introspection.
See I was always thoughtful always thinking
taking in my surroundings
either you react or you find things confounding.
Now I am drowning
in the words I meant to say
I wish I could react normally
realise there are shades of grey
I know people are neither fully good or fully bad
I realised that along time ago
but now I need to let go of fear before I can grow.
See I have had enough of being the daydreamer
who sits alone in the school playground
with imaginary friends.
I have had enough of real friends
who turned out to be dead ends
when we grew apart.
At this point in my life
I acknowledge that nothing is constant
or consistent
my fear of letting go
has grown too big to be ignored.
I know that I am flawed
but I have reached
the crossroad
where I have to choose
to change
to rearrange
before it is too late.
